Michael Curtis: The Five G’s

I have a friend, Michael Curtis, who I love and respect dearly. I asked him to write a guest blog post on something we were just talking about at lunch Sunday. :)

From here on out unless otherwise noted, Michael's got the wheel:

The Five G’s of the Modern Worship Musician
gear, grub, gas, girls, and God

We weekend musicians have all been here. It’s monday, and you just made $200 this past weekend at a Dnow playing a few worship sets, napping during the day, and demolishing some cold pizza; the cash is burning a whole in your pocket. Most of us have a few options as to how to use our spending money. “Spending money” is also a very loose term. Your first instinct is to hop on Craigslist and hunt for a used Nova Delay, Jet Drive, or if you’re really going big, a Morgan. Your current gear setup clearly isn’t cutting it, even though it’s two guitars, five pedals, and $3,500 later since you first got rid of your Squier Bullet.

Ok, it’s 2 am and let’s say you get a hold of yourself. You’re (sadly) NOT spending it on gear. To satisfy your depression, you need some Whataburger, AKA, grub. Since most of us are not blessed enough to have a Whataburger within walking distance, or if you’re wearing Toms and horn rimmed glasses right now, biking distance, you hop in the car. You can’t stuff your face full of taquitos alone, so you call up your bros. Since it was your idea, you gotta pick them up. This burns a valuable commodity, gas. If you, like myself, are stuck with a large car with the sole purpose of hauling lots equipment, you’re shelling out a lot here. Here’s a tip: if your back seat is removable, take it out. Less seats means the less frequent playing of the, “Hey, you have a big car with lots of room. You drive!” card. The back of your car is still probably full of gear from this past weekend anyway, and thus doubles the value of your automobile. Keep your insurance card handy.

You got 3 or 4 buds with you. Now it’s game time. After devouring everything in site, your trays now look like a beautiful war zone of picanté, butter, and cheesy goodness. Your work here is done. Trips like these often dominate weekly mealtimes in other venues such as Chik-fil-a, Taco Bell, and Waffle House. Pass the syrup. All these trips eventually add up. By Thursday you are eating roman noodles and PB & J’s for all three meals. But, being the smartest and nicest boyfriend/husband ever, you saved up for a date Friday night for your 4th g, your girl. You were gone all last weekend playing the Dnow, so you’ve clearly got to give your woman some quality time. $10 flowers. $50 meal. $20 movie tickets. $20 in gas. Say goodbye to that TimeFactor. After having an amazing evening, you return home, have a hopefully relaxing and/or productive saturday afternoon, and get ready to play at church tomorrow morning.

The first set goes great. After heading down to your seat for the sermon, the offering buckets are passed. You’re handed the monetary containment device and smoothly pass it off. Staring straight forward, you can’t help but notice some awkward stares. Now’s the time to get out some poster board, write “I pay my tithe online” in large block letters, and hold it above your head. But hey, God (big G) knows your giving, right? By your next paid gig, you’ve burned through your last check. It could’ve been used by one overdrive pedal and a date. Maybe it was ten whataburger trips and your tithe hit this week. All I know is my extra cash is going to one of these g’s.

Michael is working on a site of his own and will be launching it sometime this summer hopefully.  :)  When it's up I will update this post with the link so you can join me in enjoying his writing more often.